The Black Girl's Guide to Sex

Pssst. Come closer. I have a secret to tell you. I know this might be shocking, but brace yourself... There is no such thing as a Black Girl's Guide to Sex. Black women do not have some guide book, written or unwritten, about how to please a man that is any different from white women or women of other ethnicities. At least, there is no material exclusive to them that isn't readily available on a newsstand or in your local adult superstore. And being part Asian, I can also assuredly tell you that the Asian Girl's Guide to Sex doesn't exist, either. Let's get something straight. It is no different being with a black woman than it is being with a white woman, or any other race. Black women are not from Mars. Latina women are not from Venus. Asian women are not from Mercury. Native Americans are not from Jupiter...ad nauseum, but the point is assuredly taken. I'm so tired of seeing the ignorance. "I've never been with a [insert ethnicity here] girl before." As if there is something different about any woman of color? The only differences are spawned from the gremlins in your head, subconscious or not. Maybe it's taboo to you on some level, overtly or not, and you get off on anything taboo. The color of my skin, the shape of my eyes and nose, the fullness of my lips, the texture of my hair - these things are not a proxy for skill or desire. There is very little in the way of physicality that desire can't make up for. So if you are white and happen to hook up with a non-white girl, realize that you take the same 50/50 crapshoots every time: whether or not she's into you, if she knows how to kiss, if she knows how to please you, if she even wants or is willing to please you. There is nothing that she does that is taught only to black women. Our mothers don't sit us down to pass on secret sexual tips taught only to women of our ethnicity. There is no cultural difference. It's all on an individual basis. Desire is not a cookie-cutter trait. Stop the ignorance. Stop treating us as if we are not human. We are the same as any other women. It's time to clean out the gremlins. Enough already.